Fever's Rant #2: "The Meaning of Marriage"

[Fever]

I've spend a lot of time thinking about marriage over the last couple years. Not because I want to get married, but because I've seen so many tragedies happen with marriage that it has made me have my doubts. I've seen 4 marriages so far fall apart just in my family. So is marriage really worth it anyway?



The way I see it, marriage doesn't mean anything anymore. Looking through history, marriage was taken a lot more seriously. All marriage is to me is a religious traditional ceremony resulting in a legally and financially binding contract for life. Sounds like selling your soul away for someone and you don't even know if/when they will betray you. But here's an official definition to make sure.

"The social institution under which a man and woman establish their decision to live as husband and wife by legal commitments, religious ceremonies, etc."

Close enough. Not I'm not going to get into gay marriage. That's another subject. I'm just here to express my thoughts about the foundations of marriage. I know I'm definitely not ready for marriage and it's not in my immediate future at all. I have to have full trust and feel completely happy. I would need marriage counseling before as well. As complicated as things have been for me already in relationships, it's probably safer for me to not get married.

What do you all think about marriage? What does it mean to you?

[PkMn Trainer]

It all depends on your current situation.  I'm hoping to live a happy married life someday.   That's the American dream, anyway.  Get settled, buy your own house, raise children.  Barbecue.

O' course I ain't ready for it.  I'm the youngest main member here.  Maybe when I'm around 30 or somethin'.  Hittin' the boring ages.

Positive views on marriage have been declining, particularly due to America's decline.  Only time will tell what we will do.

[ArkticDark]

the creation of marriage wasn't even about love. It back when women had no rights in the old world. They were sold to a man or a family. Like, you can have my daughter when she becomes 15 for 3 goats and a basket of eggs and vegetables. Then she is your property and you can do as you see fit with her. This is the original marriage.

Even with rich families, daughter were just trade fodder. Marriage changed a little after awhile when people in love wanted to wed.

But then divorce was invited and that was against the law and against God.

So marriage has been changed and tanted so much through time already why not just keep ****in it even more??? Just allow gay marriage because its not like people take marriage as serious as they used to. It isn't a marriage integrity issue it is a gay hating issue.

Anyway marriage is against human nature. As base human animals we aren't even supposed to get married.

And marriage really isn't even a religious thing or have anything to do with God.

Its just that back when it was invented in that time religion was put into everything. Religion was on peoples minds every moment of the day. So they applied a meaning of religion to every aspect of their lives, including marriage.

So it isn't even as serious for modern day as people make it out to be. They just can't let go of out dated traditions.

Now adays people don’t have religion on their minds as much. So why apply the same traditions? It is meaningless.

Scientists say that our love chemicals runout for another person around 3 years. And if it makes it longer the max is like 7 years. So after 7 years people are just trying to stay together because they need to fullfil the tradition and decide to live unhappy but try to make the best of it. or are afraid of being alone and are comfortable and too scared to go find new fresh love like their base instincts are telling them to do. That's why people ****in cheat so much because marriage is unnatural.

So there is my views on the topic.

[PkMn Trainer]

Living life to its fullest, Arktic?

[Fever]

Thank you for the serious responses. I know the background of marriage like that and thanks for posting that Arktic. The meaning of marriage has definitely changed. Unfortunately, it didn't change in a good way.

Today it's more materialistic then meaningful. Marriage today has lost it's value. I don't even feel excited for anyone else that gets married lol. I don't even know what I would want for my kids since I don't know for myself.

[PkMn Trainer]

Marriage is declining, but not to the point where it has dropped dead and been abandoned.  I'd call it a letdown rather than a no longer useful tradition.

[XxReptarxX]

Honestly, you are correct. Marriage has changed a lot, but just the way people treat it. If people were to treat marriage as the sacred bond it is supposed to be, then there wouldn't be such a problem.

And that crap about us running out of love for one person is BS. You just need to know how to do something new and to create a spark in a long term relationship. There are so many couples that have been married 20+ years, even 50 years, and are still so much in love. It's about finding someone that is amazing you even as the years go on, not just someone who was really amazing at first, and you just get married right away.

I am a very traditional type of person, I believe in marriage and family, not gay people or divorce. It seems that today people get married with divorce in mind, knowing that if things don't go well, they can just get out. That's stupid. Divorce should only be used in certain circumstances, not because you didn't even know the person you married at all.

Another big aspect of the changes of marriage throughout time is people, and how they are. Nowadays, people don't really give a f*ck about anyone but themselves. It's nearly impossible to trust anyone. because a lot of people are out to betray and hurt you, which is so wrong. I believe in putting your loved ones before you in everything.  

[PkMn Trainer]

I like your traditional, positive view.

[Fever]

I believe in doing all that is possible to save a relationship before ending it or getting a divorce. Creating a new spark when things slow down is perfect but communication is needed. It's important.

Marriage has been so warped by celebrities. Whom don't even last long and get married several times in a short period of time.

[PkMn Trainer]

That's because they think they're perfect life forms.   Not counting the good honest people like Will Smith, who is the best.

[Fever]

And their $30 million dollar weddings. It just blows my mind how you can spend that much money on a one time event to soon be divorced anyway. Think about how many people could have been helped with that money and the divorce money lol.

[PkMn Trainer]

Well... it's those kind of extravagant weddings that help wedding planners and all the people behind the scenes have their job. xD

They're rich and think they're on a different level because of their fame.  It's obvious.

[XxReptarxX]

Yeaa, wedding planners do need their jobs and such, but it is ridiculous to spend that much money on something that is supposed to be so un-materialistic. A marriage is much more magical with the tremendous feeling of love powering over the fact that the dress cost thousands, and the size of the ring, and the ridiculously extravagant cake.

I could never waste a ton of money on a wedding. Because the cost doesn't make the actual lifetime with the person you vow to spend the rest of your life with any better. I would rather make my own dress than wear something that cost $5000.

[ArkticDark]

There is just too much freedom to try and inforce rules on something like marriage. Liberty comes at a cost. The cost is loss of order. CHAOS!!!

Things will never be right as long as we have too much freedom. A perfect world is not a free world. So if you enjoy your freedom you gotta accept that nothing is going to be perfect. Not enough rules inforced to keep the peace and order of things people desire but they also want freedom from such constrictions. Such a hypocracy.  Can't have your cake and eat it too ameica.

Look at china, they are running ****. Jus sayin.

That was my rant for the week.

[PkMn Trainer]

As for China, its censorship and control... don't exactly affect marriage, but how its people feel about their country.  Asian people are much more traditional when it comes to marriage.

You went beyond the topic. o_o''' But what you say makes sense.  I still like life in America haha.

[Fever]

Asian people are much more traditional anyway lol. But Arktic has the idea of my next rant...

[PkMn Trainer]

/)_<'''

SMF's gonna track us down, I swear it...

[Fever]

For what?

[ArkticDark]

 I'm not campaigning for communism I appreciate my freedom while being aware of the equivalent exchange. I am able to accept the chaos of freedom.

I was jus sayin alot of people can't accept the chaos of freedom, they some how want a perfect free world. It ain't happening. It's impossible.

Acceptance is a part of inner peace.

[Fever]

As for China, its censorship and control... don't exactly affect marriage, but how its people feel about their country.  Asian people are much more traditional when it comes to marriage.

You went beyond the topic. o_o''' But what you say makes sense.  I still like life in America haha.

I don't know anybody that would prefer their country to ours.

[PkMn Trainer]

That's why there has been so much immigration to America in its history.
___

Lol OK I getcha Arktic.

[Fever]

Forced immigration over here...

[XxReptarxX]

And Immigration does suck. People say that all of us in America immigrated here back in the 1700s, which is true, but we hadn't even completely discovered the whole world yet. Now every country has definite borders, and people shouldn't illegally come and go as they please. I know life in countries such as Mexico sucks, but so does life in America. If Mexico is so bad, the people need to start a revolution, which is the only way to fix the problem, because people are going to continue coming here illegally.

I know that here in Reno, if we even just sent back all of the illegal Mexicans and Filipinos, there would be so many jobs open to American citizens that are out of work. We are just going farther and farther into dept with our tax dollars going in a welfare system that is just overused and abused. Illegals have the jobs, and the Americans live off of welfare. That sums up a lot of Reno. It's sad the way things have become. =/

[Fever]

I wish they would go away too but that's the thing about America. It isn't a place where it was about a single race. It's for everybody. That's what makes it so different.

But this isn't about marriage so...

[PkMn Trainer]

Then again there are illegal immigrants who are willing to work for very low wages and fuel production with their cheap labor.  I don't support illegal immigration, but there's two sides to the issue.  It's good we're crackin' down on this kind of smuggling.